Zumba makes me happy

It's no secret that I've always enjoyed movin' and groovin' to music. There are a two ultra-embarrassing home videos that come to mind of spazz-tastic prancing and spinning in the living room (Paula Abdul and Garth Brooks...), both at a fairly young age. Then, of course, there are the more sophisticated moments of actual choreographed movements that have been captured on video from numerous Nutcracker and Spring Recital performances. Ultimately, I really love to dance.

When I started getting serious about ballet, I was constantly told that to be a good ballerina means having some experience in other forms of dance, like jazz and modern. I was hesitant to try anything other than ballet because I felt I was more the graceful type. The reality was, I carried myself in a more balletic way, and it was somewhat awkward to let loose. To this day, standing with my feet in a parallel position feels so weird; standing turned out feels much more natural. I tried jazz, modern, and tap in conjunction with ballet, and I can say I really did enjoy them. At the time, I'm not sure I really drew the connections between the disciplines that I can now, but it was a smart move to at least expose myself to other forms of dance.

Recently, I decided to try dancing again. I found a great studio that is for adults only and really focuses on the fitness side of things. My favorite class is their Bella Barre, which incorporates ballet, pilates, and yoga. There's lots of stretching and strengthening, all set to whatever type of music the instructor feels like playing. I've never been particularly strong in any area of my body, but after four months of classes, I'm starting to notice muscles in places I didn't know I was even supposed to have muscles. I'm no where near looking like a body builder, or even sporting anything resembling a six pack, but I can just feel a difference in the way I move. Awesome!

There are so many other classes offered at the studio, and I thought I would try Zumba. I was totally nervous at first, recessing back to my old awkwardness of movements outside the realm of "ballet technique". When I signed up for the class online, I almost chickened out at the last minute. But Zumba has become one of my new favorite styles of dance! There's a little hip hop, a little aerobic dance, and a whole lot of Latin moves. Best of all, I leave every class absolutely drenched in sweat - not because I'm insanely out of shape, but because there is so much cardio and non-stop movement. Yes, there are times when I feel like a total dork, but there is such a wide range of skill levels in the class that everyone just blends in. There's no judgement. No competition. Really, there isn't even any particular technique to master. It's all about moving in a somewhat choreographed manner and just letting go of the stress.

Every Friday and Sunday, I sweat it out in Zumba. Mondays and Wednesdays are focused on toning and limbering in Bella Barre. I think I've finally found what I've been searching for.

Somewhere in my youth or childhood...

I was planning to continue with that "Post of the Day" list from long ago, but when I started thinking about just the sights and smells of my childhood, I became lost in so many full memories that couldn't just be limited to a simple visualization or aroma. So, instead, I thought I'd share a few snippets of very random memories I stumbled across.

• Surprises were the norm throughout my childhood. I remember when my sister and I were told, "if you clean up the playroom, we'll buy you a Nintendo." It took an entire day to clean and organize the room (I think we probably did a lot of playing in the middle of cleaning...). When we were finished, we asked if it was too late to go out and buy the Nintendo that very day. "Sorry, you'll have to wait until tomorrow." But then, suddenly, the Nintendo appeared, having already been purchased and in-house. What an awesome surprise!! Then, of course, there's the classic, "No, no, no, we're not the owners" event when we were given our first horse. I remember the Christmas we found a surprise computer, in the shower. Or, there was the day when Mom would pick us up from school for a "doctor's appointment", and we were surprisingly whisked away to Disneyland. I have always loved surprises, and I think my parents set the bar pretty high early in my life.
• Dogs, fish, ducks, horses, rats, cats, a bunny, guinea pigs...my childhood was filled with loving animal companions. I deeply regret feeling that caring for some of the pets was a bothersome chore, but I do have fantastic memories of bonding with all of them, especially the dogs and horses. I miss them all very much but am so glad to have carried that love of animals into adulthood.
• I remember watching "Fiddler on the Roof" while laying in the back of the car, driving between California and Oregon. Homemade beef jerky was one the favored treats, and the many stops along the way were always fun - "brown water", Anderson's split pea soup, "horse gone". I distinctly remember one trip, we were staying overnight at a hotel, and it happened to be Easter. I was worried that the Easter Bunny wouldn't visit us because we weren't at home; sure enough, we woke up to eggs hidden around the hotel room and baskets full of treats. What a clever bunny!
• The worst illness/injury I remember as a child was when I stepped on a bee. I was at a horse camp, having a water day of some sort. We were running around barefoot on a clover field, and I felt a sharp pain in my foot. I hobbled over to the port-o-potty and asked one of the other campers to go get an adult. She came back shortly and told me that the adult said, "Don't worry, you're ok", but no one was coming to help me. I asked her to go again, and finally an adult came. Apparently, this little "helper" had said I was upset because there were bees around me...she didn't mention I had actually been stung.
• We moved...a lot. It wasn't a negative experience, and while I can't say I had a favorite house, I do know my least favorite was the Schoolhouse Creek house. This was the first house we moved into when we arrive in Oregon, and it was up a long, dark, dirt road, slightly up a mountain. At the bottom of the mountain was an old graveyard. I absolutely hated driving passed the graveyard every time we came home or went out, especially if it was at night. But just knowing the graveyard was nearby made me extremely uneasy in the house itself. I was so relieved when we moved.
• I loved watching my sister play video games. While I would play them once in a while, I was much happier just watching.
• I remember the day my parents told us they were getting a divorce. It was really shocking, but my biggest concern was where my dad was going to live and how I was going to be able to still spend time with both parents. But there was no divorce, and life continued on almost as if the conversation never happened. At the time, I never even thought anything of it, but I know now how hard my parents worked to keep things normal. I have such admiration for the way they continued to mend their relationship and getting ready to celebrate another anniversary in September (38 years, right?).
• Ballet was a huge part of my childhood. I remember the first class I took at Stillpoint Dance Studio, when it was in the back of a hair salon and people used to walk through the studio in the middle of class. I felt so uncoordinated and out of place, but then the movements became so natural and are still very much a part of me.

Look out, World

I have always wanted to be the best. Obviously, no one ever goes through life, striving to be mediocre or with a burning desire to fail, so perhaps it seems a bit of a no-brainer to always shoot for excellence. I suppose it would be more accurate to say, I've always been an overachiever. Not only to I "shoot for the moon", but I do everything in my power to do more than "land among the stars". Maybe it was because, growing up, I watched my sister achieve greatness (honestly, who graduates high school with a 4.25 GPA?!), or because I had the complete support of my parents to do whatever I wanted to do with my life (showing horses, studying ballet, competing on the speech team, acting, singing, etc., etc., etc.). I'm really not satisfied to be "one of many", I want to stand out. Some may consider this a personality flaw, and at times, I even frustrate myself with my break-neck desire for high achievement; however, I can honestly say I would not be where I am today if it were not for this passion for pushing limits.

At age 27, I am a homeowner, I hold a Masters degree, I have distinguished myself as a National Board Certificated Teacher, and I am happily married. I am working as the Director of Curriculum and Instruction at a charter high school, making history as the first single-gender public school in our state, and will soon be featured in a nationally-released documentary. I love my professional life, I love my personal life - I'm an all-around satisfied person.

But I'm not finished. This is not the end of my journey. As far as I've come, and as much as I've already accomplished, there are still many milestones I have yet to conquer. The question is, what are my next steps? What direction am I headed in? Is it time to sit back and enjoy the ride, or should I keep pushing to the top? Who knows what opportunities lie ahead, who I will meet along the way, what impact I will leave on society. I want to be someone of note, someone who truly matters, someone who makes a difference.

Is it conceded to want these things for myself, or are these lofty aspirations justifiable?